3 weeks in...

Helllooo~~

It has been 3 weeks since the year has started. And I just wanted to say how time seems to be passing so slowly... Honestly, the hours in a day fly by and yet the days are crawling like a baby taking its first steps. Thought 2013 can be likened to that. At least for me. The time has come again where I am the oldest in the school. The responsibilities were as much the same as they were when I was in P6. Just much heavier since I am older. I was 12 then. Young and naive. Now I am going to be 16...It is really time for me to start being more mature.

2013 has been okay-ish so far. I have actually been sleeping really early. And I have been waking up much more refreshed and all. I think I should try to sleep early now since I am definitely going to be much busier as the year goes by and the study loads get heavier. It is eventually become a habit- a good habit at that!

However, I am still battling with the problem of getting easily distracted while I am on the computer. And I still have not really started doing my work yet. I still tell myself that I will do it tomorrow -.- I even bought a notebook to write in all my notes and I have barely used that!

Again, the number one reason is that I am too caught up with training. I feel so tired after training these days. And our competition has already started. My stamina really dropped since the December holidays... I usually don't feel that tired after training.

Oh god! Training is another headache altogether! I keep feeling as if I am not giving my best; giving my all. On some days, I'd find myself thinking about how many months there are left until I don't have to train anymore. I should not be thinking like that. Such a negative outlook on trainings.

I think I have to psych myself more. And I need to put in more effort for my stamina. It is already my last year of playing, I need to give it all I've got! We've already played two matches so far. And our last match for our qualifying round into the semi-finals is the most important one of them all. And I need to be a player whom my coach can trust to put down on court and help the team score points.

My coach have told me countless times that I have the skills. It is just that I do not want to put in the effort she knows I can give. I think I agree with her. I do not know why I am so weak-minded as to easily give up when I am tired. The other players are tired too! What makes me so special?

I think that when I get tired, I get discouraged and I don't want to put in the effort of defending harder. And then, my playing becomes sloppy and weak. This should not be the behaviour of someone who has 5 years of experience behind her!! (Note my double exclamation marks)

Henceforth, from today onwards, I promise to give it my all for all my trainings and my games. I have never lasted one entire quarter before. I need to be able to do that for my games. I MUST PERSEVERE ON!